


as long as you stay with me

by redbatman



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Established Relationship, First Time, Human Castiel, M/M, Newly Human Castiel, Post-First Time, bc thats actually what this is, i am so rusty on tagging i have been away for so long, is there a tag for like
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-25
Updated: 2018-04-25
Packaged: 2019-04-27 15:56:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14429046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redbatman/pseuds/redbatman
Summary: Dean laughs. "What," Cas says flatly. "What's funny."Dean grins. "Oh my god, nothing, just...like it's still so weird hearing you swear. And I can't think of that many expletives that would just be.... more on the nose."Cas gives him a withering look. "Really.""Dude you get what I mean though right, like-""Would you like it if I said 'oh my father' instead of 'oh my god'", Cas says and Dean goesOh Jesus Cas please don't-. "Would that be funny to you.""Oh my god Cas-I mean, holy shit-I mean…Jesus," Dean can't stop laughing. "Oh fuck."





	as long as you stay with me

**Author's Note:**

> uh..........................hello.
> 
> it's been a minute huh. i used to be aingealaerach if youre staring at this fic wondering who the fuck redbatman is.
> 
> title is from oh girl you're the devil by mika I can honestly say I did not put much thought into the title.

Dean tucks his face into Castiel’s chest and smiles when he feels his breath on his hair. He feels relaxed for about a minute, before his brain kicks the hard drive back online and he can access all of, you know, his _thoughts._ Did he do a good enough job? Did he make Cas feel good? Did he make Cas happy? God, what if this was just selfish of him, what if this wasn’t what Cas really wanted and he was just kidding himself that this could ever work out and-

_Okay, Dean, pump the fucking brakes. Just…ask him._

“Are you…good?” he asks. His heart is beating kinda fast. 

“I’m fantastic,” Cas replies. “Except-”

“What,” he looks up at Cas nervously.

Cas grumbles. “I’m so tired. Is this what being human is like, all the time?”

Dean feels a wave of relief wash over him. He could take a fucking bath in all this relief, catch it in a bucket and make a camp shower. “I mean. Yeah, mostly,” he replies. “‘specially if you live the lifestyle I do. Zero out of ten doctors recommend it.”

“That is so…stupid,” Cas says, sounding genuinely disgruntled.

“I’ve been trying to tell you for years, man. Sleep is a damn precious resource,” Dean says. “You gotta get it when you can.”

They both fall silent. Castiel’s arms feel so nice around him. Now that he’s mentioned it, Dean feels tired too. Cas is tracing shapes on his back with his fingers and it’s so good. He feels safe.

He lets himself drift for a minute before he trips on another dumb thought and opens his mouth again. “Can I ask-” Dean says. “Never mind, no, it’s stupid.”

“Ask,” Cas insists.

Dean presses his face back into his chest. “Didyoulikeit,” the words come out in a rush and he feels the tips of his ears turning red.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite catch that,” Cas continues to trace patterns on his skin.

He forces himself to move out of the circle of Castiel’s arms enough to look him in the face. “I just…uh,” this is so embarrassing. “Did you like it…I mean, did you enjoy. Uh. What we did…before,” he finishes lamely.

Cas kisses him on the nose. “Of course I did,” he says firmly. “Did you?”

He bites back a hysterical giggle. _As if he hasn’t fantasized about this since he was 29._ “Uh, yes,” he says. “Yes, I did. Um. A lot.”

“I’m glad,” Cas says. There’s nothing particularly effusive or outwardly emotional about his tone, but it’s Cas and yeah he does sound like he is _glad._

Unfortunately, Dean can still hear the synapses firing in his brain so he just has to-

“If you were like,” he feels likes his whole face must be bright red at this point. “If you were to…describe it. Uh. What would you say.”

Cas actually looks like he’s thinking of the best words to describe how he feels about having sex with him. If Dean dies of embarrassment now, his headstone will read _You Brought This On Yourself._  

There’s a pause.

"Holy fuck," Cas says.

Beat

Dean laughs. "What," Cas says flatly. "What's funny."

Dean grins. "Oh my god, nothing, just...like it's still so weird hearing you swear. And I can't think of that many expletives that would just be.... more on the nose."

Cas gives him a withering look. "Really."

"Dude you get what I mean though right, like-"

"Would you like it if I said 'oh my father' instead of 'oh my god'", Cas says and Dean goes _Oh Jesus Cas please don't-_. "Would that be funny to you."

"Oh my god Cas-I mean, holy shit-I mean…Jesus," Dean can't stop laughing. "Oh fuck."

Cas is actually smiling. "A lot of your swear words seem to be religion based, I'm not really sure how you expect me to avoid that."

"I don't, just-it's funny," he says. "It'd be worse if we spoke French, I guess."

Cas looks at him serenely. "You know actually I think I will start saying 'oh my father', thank you for the great idea."

"Noooooo," Dean says. "Oh my god. I won't have sex with you anymore if you do that."

He pretends to consider it. "Okay I _guess_ I won't do it."

"Please never say it again."

"Are you sure you don't-"

"I'm gonna kill you," Dean says deadpan and Cas laughs at him.

"He's not even really my father," Cas says. "I mean, I suppose he could be considered the human equivalent in a specific scenario where you wake up and there is no trace of a father ever having been there, beyond a list of instructions left pinned to the fridge. But in a cosmic sense."

"That...sort of did happen to me once," Dean says. "Actually-it happened to me a bunch." He laughs.

"What," says Cas. "What's funny now."

"It's just..." he's giggling, actually. That's the only word for the stupid sounds coming out of his mouth. "This is kind of what we bonded over. In the first place. It's come full circle, dude."

Cas just looks at him. "Well, Dean, I guess when you only talk about it once a decade it's bound to come up again."

"Ow! Ouch!" he laughs. "Wow you just burned me so hard."

"Not to repeat you," Cas says. "But I won't have sex with _you_ anymore if you keep calling me 'dude'."

"Oh my god, that's mean," Dean whines, drawing out the syllables. _meeeeaaaan_. "You know I can't help it."

Castiel's expression contains an absolute zero sum of pity. "Well. I guess you're just gonna have to learn how to."

"Can I call you buddy then?"

"No."

"Pal?"

"No."

"Pleeeeeease?" Dean honest to god bats his eyelashes  

Cas gazes at him dispassionately. "Okay, maybe you can...I'll consider it-" Dean grins at him and he raises an eyebrow. "I'm joking. Absolutely not."

“But what if I-Hey!” Dean exclaims as Cas pointedly lets go of him and rolls to the other side of the bed. “Noooo, please come back I won’t do it anymore, I swear. Whatever you want." 

“I don’t trust you,” Cas replies, but he obligingly rolls back over and wraps his arms around Dean, who tucks his face into his chest again.

Dean is actually pretty ready to fall asleep now, but it’s Cas who breaks the silence again. “So,” he says. “You like it when I give you positive feedback.”

“Ohmygod,” Dean feels like he’s on fire. “Don’t say it like that.”

“Praise, then,” he rejoins.

“That’s, um,” he breaks off. “That’s so embarrassing.”

Cas has this look in his eyes like he’s _really_ figured something out and he’s probably gonna be smug about it for the rest of linear time. “What’s embarrassing about me telling you that you were so good for me,” he says. Dean whimpers _Oh my god_ into a pillow and Cas continues. “That you were such a good-”

Dean literally squeaks.

“I won’t do anything you’re not comfortable with,” Cas says seriously. “But you can ask for what you want.”

“That’s…uh,” Dean says, trying to will the blush off his face. “That’s really hard for me? You’ve…probably noticed.” Cas hums in affirmation. “But. Thank you. I’ll try,” he notices he’s shaking a bit. “I want to try.”

Cas kisses his cheek. “I want to try too.” It’s sort of embarrassing how much that chaste gesture of affection affects Dean, but also he’s starting to think maybe he needs to banish the word _embarrassing_ from his vocabulary for a while.

Okay. Bed time for real.

He moves to sit up and turn the lamp off and Cas mumbles in protest. “Oh relax,” he says. “I’m just turning off the light,” he flips the switch and quickly finds his way back to his _boyfriend’s_ arms in the dark.

“This is so nice,” he whispers, because it is.

“Shh,” Cas says. “Go to sleep.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> hi! wow i haven't posted in almost a year. it's been a weird year.
> 
> i was thinking about my least favourite Angel Dialogue Fic Joke and i genuinely wrote the middle section of this impulsively in my phone memos yesterday while i was on the bus headed to my final exam of the semester and it was so fun i just....made it a whole thing?
> 
> i'm also in the middle of writing two other short fics that are my usual brand of Coda Tragedy so this may provide some light-hearted levity which is atypical of my content here but gosh writing dean and cas is so FUN. 
> 
> i hope i didn't leave like a million typos in this. i'm sure i'll find some after this gets posted. i am STILL gaydean on tumblr so see u around.


End file.
